scoopdidoop
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I joined August 2018
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Post by scoopdidoop on Aug 13, 2018 23:42:33 GMT
Hey I'm a fellow member of the Indian community and I know most Indian parents are skeptical of their kids going out with their friends and will monitor with who and where they are going, but due to my parents being extra strict I have not been able to go out with friends or even enjoy myself and take a break in 3 years, what do you suggest I do?
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Post by Ash on Aug 14, 2018 4:36:52 GMT
To be honest, beyond a point it's really difficult to both listen to your parents/live the life they expect and be your own self. If you want to go outside, you should start doing so. Start pushing the boundaries with your parents, one small step at a time. And firmly tell them that they can't stop you from living your life. This is all provided you can have such open discussions with them. If not, start lying. It sucks but nothing else can be done.
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Post by Pav on Aug 14, 2018 5:34:42 GMT
I agree with Ash. You can’t live for them. So start living the way you want even if it means lying..........you only get to enjoy this one life.
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Post by Kathryn on Aug 14, 2018 5:42:52 GMT
I'm from an Orthodox Christian family and my parents, my mom to be precise wouldn't even let me hang out after school with my friends for paani puri. I had spent 18 years of my life in a city and I explored (secretly) only 5 km radius from my house. I had to leave to a different city for my UG...and that's when I really got to explore my interests. It was very difficult in the beginning but I had to get a lot of things done myself like getting started on a new bank account and bus pass and stuff. So when my parents saw me being able to take care of myself in a different city with a different language, that's when they loosened the reins. They don't exactly let me go on trips...but I'm allowed to stay out with my friends till 9 in the night instead of 5 in the afternoon or have sleepovers. It's a huge process and you need to allow your parents to see that you are old enough to take care of yourself. Starting with doing things for your house like getting the month's groceries and then later, you can ask them if you can do things for yourself.
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Gotta stick together
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Post by Gotta stick together on Aug 14, 2018 6:23:28 GMT
I would strongly recommend that you sit and maybe have a conversation with them about this. I used to be in a similar situation and would think that no good will come out of talking to them about this and that it will only make things worse, but surprisingly things improved for the better. A lot of times our parents are so used to the restrictions and way of living they had while growing up that they don't realize that it is not the way things work nowadays and that it's suffocating you. Don't have a screaming match or something like that, just sit them down and try to have a mature, practical conversation with them and hopefully they will agree to start with little things at least.
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Post by 6895 on Aug 14, 2018 9:25:17 GMT
Hey I'm a fellow member of the Indian community and I know most Indian parents are skeptical of their kids going out with their friends and will monitor with who and where they are going, but due to my parents being extra strict I have not been able to go out with friends or even enjoy myself and take a break in 3 years, what do you suggest I do? If you’re an adult, then it’s time to take control of your life. I can relate to your situation. My parents used to be like this and the only way I was able to change it was by creating boundaries. I’d suggest if you don’t have a job, get one which will show them you’re mature enough to be out and about on your own or with friends. Talk to them calmly and tell them how you feel. If they have the slightest bit of empathy, they will understand. Also, try moving out if possible. |
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Post by Browngirl on Aug 14, 2018 15:56:05 GMT
First of all how old are you? If you are an adult and have the means of moving out of the family home so be it you would never get a question or a poll of a desi boy asking how to deal with strict parents and leaving the home they do as they please and desi parents just kiss the puthars ass😒 sit down with them explain you are your own person you have every right to go out and have a social life you are not just meant to go educate yourself, cook, clean and stay in the house like it’s your prison why should you explain? Would a son have to explain why he needs his freedom? NOPE!
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Strict parent survivor
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Post by Strict parent survivor on Aug 14, 2018 19:54:10 GMT
Hey I'm a fellow member of the Indian community and I know most Indian parents are skeptical of their kids going out with their friends and will monitor with who and where they are going, but due to my parents being extra strict I have not been able to go out with friends or even enjoy myself and take a break in 3 years, what do you suggest I do? Ask for forgiveness not permission |
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Post by Z on Aug 14, 2018 21:31:53 GMT
Hey its the same person who wrote the post and I'm 17 almost 18 and I have tried talking to them about it and they say yes one time but u guys know how Indian parents are, as soon as I ask, they say I can't go with no actual reason other than 'I said so' and being completely honest ive never been a kid to go somewhere I'm not supposed to be or do something I'm not supposed to, I just wanna hang out a chill with friends. This is also making me lose friends as some of them I can't see at school all the time and lose contact with after attempting to make plans with multiple times, any advice???
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